Stories of impact

Cece 's Story

Cece came over to the UK from Colombia with her husband. She made a few friends at first, but her husband soon stopped her communicating with them and with her family. It was when she became pregnant that the domestic violence started…and continued as her baby, a daughter, grew. With the help of her few friends, she escaped and eventually was moved with her daughter to a refuge in Islington.

  • Cece struggled at the refuge, not knowing anybody and feeling isolated. In addition, her daughter was being bullied by some of the other children. A local church provided some social contact and it was there that she was told about a preschool at St Mary’s.

    ‘I thought I would pop in and have a look and, right from the beginning, everyone was very kind and welcoming. I just wanted somewhere that was going to be safe for my daughter and where she could make friends and be herself. At the time, I was in the middle of a court case for my daughter and didn’t want to keep taking her to the court or leaving her with different people.’

    The little girl made friends and loved going to our preschool. ‘My daughter was quite clingy at first but she came along with me and played with the other children while I was doing the paperwork. I was astonished how quickly she settled. She would talk about her (key person) and the manager, Sharon, and draw pictures about them at home. You could see that, despite where we lived, she was happy’. So the preschool suited her daughter.

    In addition, it suited Cece. ‘Sharon really helped me in being flexible with my fifteen hours so that I could attend the court and buy some extra time. I really needed the flexibility as I wasn’t entitled to any financial support. She gave me time to talk and helped me to access family support and social care so I could get the help I needed to leave the refuge. I realised I couldn’t live in London because it was too expensive and I wanted my daughter to live where there were green spaces. Sharon even knew the town I was thinking of moving to and suggested a particular area. I didn’t expect all that help’.

    St Mary’s preschool helped both Cece and her daughter to become more confident. ‘The preschool made life feel normal for me and my daughter. It was lovely when I met other parents and we could have a playdate with my daughter and a friend. Now we have found a flat and my daughter got into school and she is looking forward to it. Mary’s has done so much.

    All contributions towards our work go towards extending these opportunities to more families.Description text goes here

Leyla's Story

Leyla was only two years old when her mother died. Her mother had been ill for some time, had gone back to her family in her own country and, sadly, never returned home. Her husband then had to cope not only with two older daughters, who could understand what had happened but also with Leyla, who was just so young. He found it impossible to tell her that her mother had gone forever.

  • His wife, before her final trip to Turkey, had heard good things about Mary’s preschool and had already filled in an initial application. Leyla was due to start in summer. After his wife’s death, the father had to stop work for some time and managed to organise a home visit. That was when Sharon, our Manager, who went to his home with Alison, a preschool practitioner, discovered that Leyla’s mother had died.

    During that visit, Alison had the opportunity to play with Leyla whilst Sharon talked with the father. Says Sharon: ‘So much of what we do when we accept a child into our preschool is supporting the family. That’s one of the reasons we do the home visits – to understand the family situation and how the child is behaving. Even at this stage, we saw the uncles and aunties pandering to her and we observed an anger in her when she punched her cousin...which is not surprising when a child is so distressed. But we realised we needed to find a way for the father to talk to his youngest daughter and for her to understand what had happened.

    Leyla’s father had said that he just wanted his daughter to be a child and to do what children do. Also, he wanted her to speak good English since they mainly spoke in their own language at home. This was a challenge for everyone.

    Coming into the preschool, Leyla only had a few words in English. The staff talked slowly, used eye contact and gestures, taking time and patience to communicate. There was another child who spoke Leyla’s language. The children became friends and the fathers met - a meeting which also helped Leyla’s father to find support for himself in his community. At first, it was hard for Leyla in the setting. When she saw other mothers, she would ask why her mother was not coming back. At times she became cross, at times she became tearful, at times she would not cooperate with her father.

    ‘We understand how difficult bereavement is – and we saw it in the way Leyla played. She was acting out her life experiences – sometimes quiet, sometimes so physical’ said Sharon. ‘We had some books about bereavement so we found a time with her father when we were able to talk to her and reassure her that her mother had to go but knew she was safe and that she had a family who loved her so much’. Said her father, ‘We could use the different stories from the books and, though sometimes she would be upset, it was OK for me to spend some time with her in the Preschool before I needed to leave’.

    Leyla made friends and so did her father. And when it came to leaving us, she was able to show him her very own special drawer – which had given her a sense of belonging and stability.

    Said Leyla’s father, ‘The staff took her to visit the next school beforehand with her friends so she was happy to talk about going to big school with her sisters. I don’t think St Mary’s could have done more’.

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Shakur's Story

Rosemary knew that Shakur, her 2-year-old son, had some difficulties. ‘He didn’t speak. He would only communicate if he really connected with someone, so I knew he needed to be somewhere quite small where the staff would be able to spend time with him. I visited 2 other preschools but realised St Mary’s offered a better setting, even though it was a bit further from home’.

  • Sharon, our preschool manager, completed a referral for Shakur to get a specialist assessment straightaway. He was diagnosed with autism and visits from Speech and Language and Occupational Therapists were quickly organised. Said Rosemary, ‘Sharon and Sinita helped with all the paperwork so we could get the help he needed. It was a blessing’.

    In the meantime, Shakur settled in with Dora, his key worker. ‘She could calm him when he got upset – and she sorted out a routine for him. That really helped, particularly with toileting. He got to learn where everything was – and Dora would tell him exactly what they were going to do, so he wouldn’t freak out and run around in circles. He loved being at St Mary’s, he was always smiling. It was familiar and he trusted his teachers. He wouldn’t stay with my sister but he would stay with his key worker, which was such a relief for me’.

    She continued, ‘We realised that Shakur was not interested in sign language so both Shakur and I were introduced to PECS (A Picture Exchange Communications System), so he could use pictures to show what he wanted. Explained Sharon, ‘Every child here has an ‘All about me’ book which is tailored to his or her individual needs. For Shakur, the pictures were much more specific, showing a coat, a snack, playing outside and so on. We put them on the wall so we made a communications space for him. When he wanted something, he would point to it and we would reinforce it in our words to him.’ In fact, Rosemary still uses the system at home, sticking pictures to the fridge. ‘It helps him to make his own choices. I learnt such a lot from St Mary’s’.

    And now Shakur is at ‘big school’. Said Sharon, ‘Shakur would come to St Mary’s from 9 till 12…then the time was extended to include lunch…then into the afternoon. Rosemary and Sinita had regular meetings to plot what Shakur had achieved and to set goals so we had a detailed programme of his development to date and Sinita was able to get an early education plan ready for his next school. Also his key person here used to travel on the bus with him to the school, at first with his Mum and then without, so he would get to know the environment. He’s settled there now. It just needed time and patience’. Said Rosemary, ‘I’m amazed at Shakur’s progress. He’s no longer just ‘stuck’ in his own world. He can move forward and it’s taken so much pressure off me’.

    All contributions towards our work go towards extending these opportunities to more families.

What Our Parents Told Us

“Thank you all for working so hard to create such a wonderful fun learning environment.”

“Thank you so much for being a great teacher and for all your encouragement and inspiration! Maybe you will think of me when you light that little lantern!”

“Thank you for looking after M so well. She had a great time and learnt so much.”

“Thank you for looking after me in preschool for so long. I will miss dancing with you and singing songs. I will come back and visit.”

“Thank you so much for your hard work, support, patience and kindness so T could enjoy her first year at school.”

“Thank you for all your hard work this year! K loves pre-school and we are pleased that our son is learning so much. You’re doing a fantastic job.”

“This is just a note to say a very BIG thank you for O’s year at Mary’s. From day one he has been so ‘at home’ in the setting and loved every session – which is a real testimony to your hard work, love and care of all the children. Thank you for your commitment and dedication. He is very sad to be leaving ………..”

“This had been a very important period of S and J’s lives, and Mary’s Pre-school has been a big part of ‘their London’, and they have been happy here. Thank you.”

“Thank you so much for welcoming G into the nursery and helping her to enjoy her time with you all.”

“Thank you for all your hard work, and looking after F.”

“What a great time C has had at St Mary’s with you. Your nursery is amazing. We will miss you all.”

“Thank you very much for all the wonderful times, all the fun, play, patience………..”

“Thank you so much for everything you have done to make E’s term at St Mary’s so enjoyable. She has had a fantastic time and will miss you all. Thanks too for all the hard work you have put in to make this last week so fun and special.”

“Thank you for making me feel so welcome at the preschool. I’ve had so much fun and will be very sad to leave.”

“Thank you very much for the kind welcoming and help and support. Not just to my daughter but for me personally too!”<

“Thank you for taking such good care of B and R in the last year. They have been so happy to go to the preschool and so happy every day when I have picked them up. We appreciate so much the kindness, love and generosity shown so consistently to both children”

“Thank you for all your support, help and great teaching through the year. You made Y into a great and confident girl, brilliant work once again – keep teaching…………”